I've been feeling so poorly the past couple days that I haven't had the energy to write.
Tonight, sitting up while eating was a bit challenging I was feeling so dizzy and a bit faint.
I had two really nice things happen. I sell used books on amazon to make a little extra money. It's badly needed. This is an expensive illness to have and I'm paying for all my medical expenses out of pocket because insurance won't cover it.
Anyway, last week the mailman (he is a man) left a large box on the doorstep. It was an amazon box. I was puzzled because I hadn't ordered anything from amazon. Then I became alarmed that someone had stolen my identity again and made a big purchase (this happened in December-someone used my credit card to purchase $500 worth of DJ equipment). I brought the box in and opened it. To my surprise, a friend of Beth's had sent me a box of books! I started crying because I was so moved by this gesture. I loved the books and put a couple aside to read myself. I just love opening a box of books and looking over each book and skimming through it. So it was a wonderful thing to get.
Then Tuesday night the doorbell rang. I thought it was either neighbors or someone selling something. Most days I don't feel well enough talk to people. The doorbell rang again about 10 minutes later. I panicked a little thinking maybe there was a family emergency. When I opened the door there was a boquet of roses and my two friends Sharon and Tommy whom I worked with a few years ago. I love these two people. We worked together in a difficult environment with a crazy boss. We all have a strong bond with each other and even though we don't see eath other much they are never too far from my mind. They stayed for about an hour. It was great. We talked politics, and laughed. They are both great people and I'm lucky to have them as friends. They check in regularly via email to see how I'm doing.
I'm also lucky to have a couple good neighbors. When they found out that Daphne was going to be gone for 5 days they offered to check in on me. It was comforting to know they were around and all I had to do was knock.
My perspective gets skewed when I feel this bad. I read this great quote recently:
Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says: "I'll try again tomorrow."