Wednesday, October 22, 2008

A Stroke of Insight

I'd heard of this book over the summer but didn't want to read it. One of my fears is having a stroke. I was afraid to read it because I didn't want it to increase my anxiety. Knowing I have some sort of brain illness is bad enough. Plus I saw how my grandmother changed after her stroke as a result of being in a car accident.

I was quite surprised to turn on Oprah to find a woman talking about her experience of having a stroke. It was riveting. I tuned in just as she was talking about how much her brain needed sleep to heal itself. I was fascinated by her story. I bought her book from Amazon and am looking forward to reading it.

Things are going okay with my experiment of letting go of the pressure to find a "cure." I don't feel in such despair. When it starts to creep in I find a way to change my thinking. It's not realistic to believe I'll never feel that despair again but one thing I'm realizing is the one thing I have control of is my attitude.

I'm still struggling with lots of symptoms. I decided to make an appointment to see my regular doctor to get some bloodwork done. I want to get my titers tested for certain viruses (HHV-6, EBV, Chlamydia Pneumonia, and other things). I'm also going to get my TSH and hormones tested. Though I like my regular doctor he is consistantly late by at least an hour. It's hard to wait that long when I feel this lousy. I'll bring a book though.

I'm noticing how important it is to protect my energy. I've become very sensitized to people who are energy sucks.

The RNase L panel won't be done until next week. I'm a little relieved as this will give me time to get the results back from tomorrow's bloodwork and make an informed decision about the next course of treatment.

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